Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Bad Things Happen When You Lie
I know that many feel a little white lie never hurts but just read the admonishment to tell the truth and what follows when one doesn't especially in the affairs of the heart. Perhaps the poet who wrote these lyrics says it all.
Be sure its true when you say, “I love you”
It’s a sin to tell a lie
Millions of hearts have been broken
Just because these words were spoken
I love you, yes I do, I love you
If you break my heart, I’ll die
So, be sure it’s true when you say, “I love you”
__________________ It’s a sin to tell a lie
Look what happens when one doesn't tell the truth.
Well, cross my heart and I hope to die
I’ll never, never, never tell another white lie
Took a little doll out on a date last night
Next to her, Gravel Gertie would have looked alnght
Now, I’m between the devil and the deep blue sea
‘Cause I said, “Baby, you look good to me”
I told her! loved her but, oh, how I lied
And now, she’s gettin’ set to be my blushin’ bride
If she leads me to the altar, then I’m sunk
‘Cause I can’t tell the preacher I was drunk
So, Lord have mercy on a no-’count sinner
Give me one more chance to let another guy win her
Cross my heart and I hope to die
I’ll never, never, never tell another white lie
So!
Be sure it’s true when you say, “I love you”
If you break my heart, I’ll die
So, be sure it’s true when you say, “I love you
_________ It’s a sin to tell a lie
_______ It’s a sin to tell a lie
Monday, January 30, 2012
Angel Tasks Made Easier By People
I believe in Guardian Angels in fact I have named mine Junior. Their tasks are many and they go for the most part unnoticed and thankless. The fact is sometimes they can't reach us even when we need their help the most. I believe they get around this problem by prompting people around us to deliver the message by word or action. Some of these people are from family and are around us for decades, others may just pop into our lives for a month, week, day, hour or even just a minute. I would like to take this time to remember those who I believe were prompted by my Guardian Angel because I was just to busy to pay attention to him/her.
The first person who comes to mind is my Grandmother. A little chubby, four foot eleven inches of a great little woman who lived a very hard life but lived an easier life when she came to live with us. She always ran interference for me just when my mother was about to kill me for some stupid act, like when I raised the temperature in the house to one hundred degrees because I was curious about the gauge on the wall. More than that was the way she lived her life, always concerned about others, going off to church daily even in the snow. She had a faith that was not schooled. She was born in 1875 and married in 1889 and never had time for school but she had insights and faith borne by living and listening to her inner voice. My Guardian Angel tried to get those virtues she had through to me but who wanted to listen to him, know what I mean?
Mrs. Goldman, my elementary school teach from 7A, 7B, 8A and 8B comes to mind. She was not universally liked. I was a terrible student and wasn't what you would call a "good boy" in her classroom. I missed 7B because I had to have an operation on both feet that required casts up to my knees, after they were removed I had to learn how to walk again. I was supposed to be left back but despite the fact that I was one of her worst students and having to be constantly reprimanded she made sure I had every day's work by physically bringing it and picking it up the next day. She then negotiated with the school that I should start the next term in 8A and if I passed the courses I could remain with my class. I passed everything but Mrs. Gallagher who taught Arithmetic gave me a 63, 65 was passing and many times the teacher would raise the 63 to 65 but Mrs. Gallagher wouldn't. Mrs. Goldman persuaded her and the Principal to raise it to 65. I passed everything from that point on and didn't get left back. However, I remained a thorn in Mrs. Goldman's side until I graduated yet she always seemed to look out for me.
High School around the second year saw me get into an English class taught by Mr. Grossfeld, later to be known as Mr. Gray. He immediately spotted my name and knew I had an older brother which he remembered not exactly fondly. That marked the beginning of his landing on me very hard. He pushed, cajoled and prodded. I do not remember the subject matter but I remember him. He was always nattily dressed, always seemed assured of himself, and had impeccable manners even when he was destroying you verbally. Somehow he got me to be aware of good manners, to have a goal besides just having a good time and to try and do the best I can at what I am trying to accomplish even if my best is not the best offered. What matters is doing the best that is inside of you and not always being put off by what others might be doing. He knew I was a trumpet player but not a Harry James but I had the ability to be a pretty good one if not the best. I didn't measure myself against anyone but myself and what I could do. He was great.
I was a pretty young twenty-two when I went into the Army. I found myself in Georgia with everybody screaming to hurry up, "move your ass" was the term used if I remember correctly. I couldn't make my bed with hospital corners and this was a major sin. I had a Puerto Rican Sargent whom I couldn't understand and was better off speaking Spanish. In order to save me all the trouble I was getting into he ended up sending me out for roll call and he made my bed with hospital corners for about three weeks. He certainly was following the advice of my Angel because he saved me a lot of trouble. During basic the squad I was in was assigned two Korean war veterans Sargents Mitchell and Kornegy. I was a little brash and stupid because I was challenging a bunch of other Sargents who happened to be white, to a fight, one at a time or all at once. They were planning to throw me down the barracks steps when Mitchell and Kornegy intervened. They convinced them to leave me alone and convinced me to keep my mouth shut. After basic these guys faded from my life but I know Junior had enlisted them for my defense. Later when I got into the Third Infantry Division Band as a second trumpeter Sargent Topalian, who was in charge of the Trumpet section and I never got along. It was obvious he was trying to move me out maybe it was because I continually showed him up, physically and mentally. Chief Warrant Officer, Marion C. Durban our CO and Band leader had me transferred to Baritone Horn. He reminded me of Mr. Grossfeld. I marched in the front rank, left flank and he was always riding me. He had fun as we spared verbally but he liked me and protected me as he kept Topalian off my tail.
I was married when I left the Army and without a college degree. I was in office work and a degree was a necessity but my idea of having fun through high school left me with a 69 average and a Commercial diploma. I started taking courses one at a time as I tried to get matriculated but the college faculty were of no help, in fact they threw roadblocks after roadblocks in my path as I tried to get into a business degree course. Then one night, at a smoke break a Philosophy Professor, Dr. Carpino, and I were talking. He was teaching my course and he said he had made the resolution that if he had something good to say to a person he would say it rather than hold it back. Dr. Carpino, then told me I should pursue a degree because he felt I had the potential to do well. He told me to become invigorated and challenge the system until I overcame the obstacles. He said he was sure I could do it. He really inspired me. I got my two year degree, AAS and the my BBA because of that man. Because of Dr. Carpino I finally entered a MBA program. There was one course, Business Physics, which saw me go blank on my final. I told the instructor that for some reason I just went blank. If I failed that course I was going to drop out. The instructor told me he knew I was a good student by my class work and doing all the problems assigned. He passed me with an A. I graduated with honors. My Guardian Angel certainly works overtime and finds the right people to be his surrogate for me when I need them the most.
There are many more people and circumstances in my life when people have made a big difference in the choices that were before me and the direction my path would take. My Guardian Angel, Junior, certainly knew the right people to put in my path. I am sure you all have similar experiences.
The first person who comes to mind is my Grandmother. A little chubby, four foot eleven inches of a great little woman who lived a very hard life but lived an easier life when she came to live with us. She always ran interference for me just when my mother was about to kill me for some stupid act, like when I raised the temperature in the house to one hundred degrees because I was curious about the gauge on the wall. More than that was the way she lived her life, always concerned about others, going off to church daily even in the snow. She had a faith that was not schooled. She was born in 1875 and married in 1889 and never had time for school but she had insights and faith borne by living and listening to her inner voice. My Guardian Angel tried to get those virtues she had through to me but who wanted to listen to him, know what I mean?
Mrs. Goldman, my elementary school teach from 7A, 7B, 8A and 8B comes to mind. She was not universally liked. I was a terrible student and wasn't what you would call a "good boy" in her classroom. I missed 7B because I had to have an operation on both feet that required casts up to my knees, after they were removed I had to learn how to walk again. I was supposed to be left back but despite the fact that I was one of her worst students and having to be constantly reprimanded she made sure I had every day's work by physically bringing it and picking it up the next day. She then negotiated with the school that I should start the next term in 8A and if I passed the courses I could remain with my class. I passed everything but Mrs. Gallagher who taught Arithmetic gave me a 63, 65 was passing and many times the teacher would raise the 63 to 65 but Mrs. Gallagher wouldn't. Mrs. Goldman persuaded her and the Principal to raise it to 65. I passed everything from that point on and didn't get left back. However, I remained a thorn in Mrs. Goldman's side until I graduated yet she always seemed to look out for me.
High School around the second year saw me get into an English class taught by Mr. Grossfeld, later to be known as Mr. Gray. He immediately spotted my name and knew I had an older brother which he remembered not exactly fondly. That marked the beginning of his landing on me very hard. He pushed, cajoled and prodded. I do not remember the subject matter but I remember him. He was always nattily dressed, always seemed assured of himself, and had impeccable manners even when he was destroying you verbally. Somehow he got me to be aware of good manners, to have a goal besides just having a good time and to try and do the best I can at what I am trying to accomplish even if my best is not the best offered. What matters is doing the best that is inside of you and not always being put off by what others might be doing. He knew I was a trumpet player but not a Harry James but I had the ability to be a pretty good one if not the best. I didn't measure myself against anyone but myself and what I could do. He was great.
I was a pretty young twenty-two when I went into the Army. I found myself in Georgia with everybody screaming to hurry up, "move your ass" was the term used if I remember correctly. I couldn't make my bed with hospital corners and this was a major sin. I had a Puerto Rican Sargent whom I couldn't understand and was better off speaking Spanish. In order to save me all the trouble I was getting into he ended up sending me out for roll call and he made my bed with hospital corners for about three weeks. He certainly was following the advice of my Angel because he saved me a lot of trouble. During basic the squad I was in was assigned two Korean war veterans Sargents Mitchell and Kornegy. I was a little brash and stupid because I was challenging a bunch of other Sargents who happened to be white, to a fight, one at a time or all at once. They were planning to throw me down the barracks steps when Mitchell and Kornegy intervened. They convinced them to leave me alone and convinced me to keep my mouth shut. After basic these guys faded from my life but I know Junior had enlisted them for my defense. Later when I got into the Third Infantry Division Band as a second trumpeter Sargent Topalian, who was in charge of the Trumpet section and I never got along. It was obvious he was trying to move me out maybe it was because I continually showed him up, physically and mentally. Chief Warrant Officer, Marion C. Durban our CO and Band leader had me transferred to Baritone Horn. He reminded me of Mr. Grossfeld. I marched in the front rank, left flank and he was always riding me. He had fun as we spared verbally but he liked me and protected me as he kept Topalian off my tail.
I was married when I left the Army and without a college degree. I was in office work and a degree was a necessity but my idea of having fun through high school left me with a 69 average and a Commercial diploma. I started taking courses one at a time as I tried to get matriculated but the college faculty were of no help, in fact they threw roadblocks after roadblocks in my path as I tried to get into a business degree course. Then one night, at a smoke break a Philosophy Professor, Dr. Carpino, and I were talking. He was teaching my course and he said he had made the resolution that if he had something good to say to a person he would say it rather than hold it back. Dr. Carpino, then told me I should pursue a degree because he felt I had the potential to do well. He told me to become invigorated and challenge the system until I overcame the obstacles. He said he was sure I could do it. He really inspired me. I got my two year degree, AAS and the my BBA because of that man. Because of Dr. Carpino I finally entered a MBA program. There was one course, Business Physics, which saw me go blank on my final. I told the instructor that for some reason I just went blank. If I failed that course I was going to drop out. The instructor told me he knew I was a good student by my class work and doing all the problems assigned. He passed me with an A. I graduated with honors. My Guardian Angel certainly works overtime and finds the right people to be his surrogate for me when I need them the most.
There are many more people and circumstances in my life when people have made a big difference in the choices that were before me and the direction my path would take. My Guardian Angel, Junior, certainly knew the right people to put in my path. I am sure you all have similar experiences.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
I Can't Stop Loving You
Try as he might he could never put into words his feelings for her. That whole macho thing kept him from letting her know just what was in his heart. After all was said and done he was a man after all and men were strong and took what they wanted never begging or God forbid let anyone see tears welling up in their eyes. She of course the very epitome of femininity. She had a softness about her that only made anyone who came into her presence feel welcome and loved. She wanted to protect and shelter her children and those she loved. She needed a man who would love her with a gentleness and need for her. She needed tenderness and understanding along with desire which would consume them in the fire of love.
As the years went by they became less aware of each other's needs and desires as they settled into living the life of a bored couple. He did try to communicate his feelings but he had become too tough, too "manly" and lost the art of being tender and caring. They were living separate lives under the same roof. She became ill and started to slip away. Just before she died he finally broke down and cried as he held her in his arms.
His voice was soft and tender, full of sobs as he whispered in her ears the lyrics of "How Deep Is The Ocean"(How High Is The Sky).
How can I tell you what is in my heart?
How can I measure each and every part?
How can I tell you how much I love you?
How can I measure just how much I do?
How much do I love you?
I'll tell you no lie
How deep is the ocean?
How high is the sky?
How many times a day do I think of you?
How many roses are sprinkled with dew?
How far would I travel
To be where you are?
How far is the journey
From here to a star?
And if I ever lost you
How much would I cry?
How deep is the ocean?
How high is the sky?
When he finished he held her a little away from him. She had tears in her eyes as she smiled and whispered "I love you" and then her eyes closed as she passed into eternity.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
The Republican Primary 2012
This is the year The Republicans can really take back the Executive branch and possibly the Senate and you know what? They look like they are going to blow it. President Obama looks weak as the economy. Perhaps some months from now the economy will pick up but if it doesn't he isn't coming from a strong position. On top of a weak economy many of the voters out there really hate the guy. They believe all the "stuff" floating around cyber-space like he isn't really who he says he is. Many actually believe, because they want to believe, that he isn't a citizen and his birth certificate is forged; that he has obtained a false social security number and that he is like the main character on the TV hit "Mad Men", Don Draper. Many actually believe Obama is a phony made up character waiting to impose Sharia law. So President Obama is ripe for the taking. But who do the Republicans put up to run against him? The strongest of their party you would think, wouldn't you? If the current crop of pretenders to the throne are the best they have to offer then they are in bad shape.
Right now they are in a cannibalistic feast feeding off one another's weaknesses and apparently there are many weaknesses to feed off. The front runner Mitt Romney, has flipped flopped on so many fronts that it is hard to define him or his policies. He tries to sell the idea that he is just like all of blue collar folk who tremble at the thought of being fired yet he has so much wealth that his tip money for the year probably matches our wages. Phony Baloney! Newt Gingrich, is he the second guy? Whatever he is, he's mad and he's seems bent on destroying Romney for ruining him in the Iowa caucuses. With the pressure coming from the core conservatives like that fat commentator, whatever his name is, and some of the politicians like McCain, he may be backing off a bit maybe trying to negotiate an Ambassadorship somewhere if the Republicans win. Notice many of those who served under his Speakership refuse to back him some even saying he can't be trusted. Rich Santorum who says openly that he wants to put religion back into politics. Have you noticed where many of our religious leaders have led us and how hypocritical they seem to be? I remember many who confessed that they have sinned and asked for forgiveness and then went right out and sinned again. I notice that they all have great clothes and live in what seems like the lap of luxury just like Jesus did. Need I say more? Santorum can't win a general nationwide election and neither can Ron Paul but the more they run the more they weaken their party. Perry of course provides comic relief so I guess he doesn't do too much harm except makes one wonder how the hell did he ever get elected Governor? Oh, yeah, I forgot the state is Texas. Is Huntsman really real? He doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell of winning the Republican primary and yet he might be the sanest guy in the race who could make a strong run against Obama nationally. Maybe they will do something at their convention and draft a candidate like Chris Christie but by then I fear they will have self destructed beyond repair and begin to think about 2016.
The one trump card the Republicans have is there are many, as I pointed out before, that actually believe Obama is a hated Muslim, Radical Black Christian, Don Draper made up guy and must be stopped at all costs even if it means weakening the United States with guys like those Republicans presently running and the policies they are espousing. Believe it or not a lot of so called nice people feel this way. Maybe there will be a change by November. One can only hope, can't one?
Right now they are in a cannibalistic feast feeding off one another's weaknesses and apparently there are many weaknesses to feed off. The front runner Mitt Romney, has flipped flopped on so many fronts that it is hard to define him or his policies. He tries to sell the idea that he is just like all of blue collar folk who tremble at the thought of being fired yet he has so much wealth that his tip money for the year probably matches our wages. Phony Baloney! Newt Gingrich, is he the second guy? Whatever he is, he's mad and he's seems bent on destroying Romney for ruining him in the Iowa caucuses. With the pressure coming from the core conservatives like that fat commentator, whatever his name is, and some of the politicians like McCain, he may be backing off a bit maybe trying to negotiate an Ambassadorship somewhere if the Republicans win. Notice many of those who served under his Speakership refuse to back him some even saying he can't be trusted. Rich Santorum who says openly that he wants to put religion back into politics. Have you noticed where many of our religious leaders have led us and how hypocritical they seem to be? I remember many who confessed that they have sinned and asked for forgiveness and then went right out and sinned again. I notice that they all have great clothes and live in what seems like the lap of luxury just like Jesus did. Need I say more? Santorum can't win a general nationwide election and neither can Ron Paul but the more they run the more they weaken their party. Perry of course provides comic relief so I guess he doesn't do too much harm except makes one wonder how the hell did he ever get elected Governor? Oh, yeah, I forgot the state is Texas. Is Huntsman really real? He doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell of winning the Republican primary and yet he might be the sanest guy in the race who could make a strong run against Obama nationally. Maybe they will do something at their convention and draft a candidate like Chris Christie but by then I fear they will have self destructed beyond repair and begin to think about 2016.
The one trump card the Republicans have is there are many, as I pointed out before, that actually believe Obama is a hated Muslim, Radical Black Christian, Don Draper made up guy and must be stopped at all costs even if it means weakening the United States with guys like those Republicans presently running and the policies they are espousing. Believe it or not a lot of so called nice people feel this way. Maybe there will be a change by November. One can only hope, can't one?
Friday, January 6, 2012
Random Thoughts While Clipping My Toenails
Has anyone but me noticed that College Graduates of today have terrible vocabulary? It would seem only proper that after spending all that money for a degree the least that could be expected would be that the graduates could speak and understand the King's English.
Shouldn't Universities be held responsible for producing graduates that have meaningless Degrees? Of course a College Degree is necessary but it should also be relevant. The schools charge high tuition and make it easy to somehow get through what used to be four years and now it is at least six. The parents and graduates come out of school holding Degrees that have huge loans attached to them that may take a lifetime to pay off. Meanwhile the Presidents and Deans live the good life, sort of like the leeches that suck the blood out of the animals.
Multi-tasking ain't a good thing. I watch as the youth of today study while texting and preparing dinner and making plans for the weekend activities. Then I hear the complaints that their social life isn't what it should be; that they've under-performed again; that dinner stinks. It would seem to me that if one would concentrate on the task at hand until it was finished then move on to the next project, things would be better. Like a baby, one step at a time until finally, walking comes naturally.
The State has balanced the budget. Hooray! The Nursing Home I know has had $6.5 Million cut from State aid in two years. The workers have not had a raise in years. The residents have to be getting lesser care as the Aids and Nurses become more over worked. I haven't noticed the Governor or State Politicians living more frugally. Have you? The Politicians in Washington keep proposing cutting spending but one side seems to want to cut more from those who are already cut to the bone while the rich get richer. The particular part of all this is the very people who are being affected by all these cuts are the very people who need the most help and they are the very people supporting the cuts. Am I crazy or what?
Has anyone noticed that the Yankees have increased their prices? The Mets have too. They tell me that the Jersey Giants and Jets (Buffalo is the only New York pro football team) charge exorbitant prices for seats but even before you can pay for the seats you've got to pay for a license to purchase the seats. I don't have all the details because there is no way in hell I can afford to go these games. Yet, except for the Mets who put out an inferior product, they are all playing to full houses. Of course Corporate buyers are there but so are ordinary people. I thought we were in a terrible recession! Maybe not all of us, uh?
I know a recent College Grad, took some six or seven years to get his undergraduate degree, who said he had a five year plan now that he's out of college. He intended to send his resume out and wait. Try different things and if he doesn't get set within five years he will reassess the situation and make another five year plan. I hope he didn't graduate with a business degree for obvious reasons. Maybe he'll go back to school for a Graduate degree and maybe he'll be forty when he runs out of five year plans. This is a college graduate?
I know an old man who wishes he was young so at least he could have one more hot romantic fling before he dies. I have finished clipping my nails. I think this is a good place to stop.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Happy Old Years That Gave All Those Happy New Years
As the year comes to an end it brings about reflective thoughts. We wish everyone, "Happy New Year" which is a good thought about an unknown situation. The New Year always symbolizes a new beginning, a fresh start. Actually it is only a continuation of wherever we find ourselves as we live our lives. I find myself this year not so much focusing on what the future might bring but what all those "New Years" that have come and gone have brought to me. This seems proper I think to focus on what has actually happened rather than on what one might hope might happen.
Being in a reflexive state I find myself going back to the beginning. By the luck of the draw, or the Grace of God, I was born into a terrific family. Not only was my Mother and Father great people who loved me but I had a ready made extended family. While it was only my brother and me there were great Uncles, Aunts Grandparents and most of all cousins of all ages that were more like brothers and sisters. We all lived within a mile of each other so everyone saw everyone almost each day. They tell me we were poor but I never knew it. There was always plenty to eat, lots of people around making a lot of noise mostly by laughing and of course arguing. The ethnicity was Italian so there was always a lot of hugging, fighting and making up. But most of all a lot of food. The whole situation was like a great cocoon with me the baby safely inside of it protected by the whole neighborhood since most were friends or friends of friends, more like family. What a great feeling, having a family which is there always for each other.
A neighborhood means so much to a kid growing up. My first neighborhood was Corona, providing the cocoon referred to above. We moved from Corona to Queensborough Hill, Flushing when I was about five years old but the Corona I knew never really moved out of me. I suddenly found myself in this new place, The Hill, with no one around that I knew. I rode my tricycle up the block and met a guy whose name was Eugene but everyone called him Babe, maybe after Babe Ruth whom he resembled or because he was the baby in his family, the third son born maybe a decade after his two older brothers. I made a lot of other friends but Babe and I are still friends after some seventy-two years. Quickly The Hill became mine. Ethnically it was different from Corona. I met a lot of Irish and they were quieter than my Italian family but they had a sense of humor that was just as quick and funny. Their food was different but it was good, my introduction to how "others" lived. Babe's mother was a real lady, genteel but his father gave a rough and tumble appearance, like he could handle himself in a brawl. Babe's two older brothers had a reputation that kept Babe safe and sound not that he needed their protection but having two older brothers in reserve just in case wasn't too bad. For WW II, one joined the Army the other the Navy, an original Intrepid gunner. Needless to say they saw plenty of action as did my uncles, and cousins. The Hill was the best place to grow up as it was a melting pot of German, Irish and Italian. We had no Blacks, Negros as they were referred to then, nor did we have more than one or two Jewish families. Our loss but that loss was made up when I went to Flushing High School. Flushing High gave me what could be called the best, although I had other bests, four years of my life. Great teachers, students and a real melting pot where I met people of all persuasions and color and grew to love them all, except of course crazy George and his gang, but I digress.
When I hit my twenties I met a great girl. She was gorgeous, smart, dressed up always and best of all laughed at all my jokes. I ran and ran after her until she finally caught me. She was Puerto Rican which was great because it exposed me to more of what other people were like, besides she had that hot Latin blood, know what I mean(?). We got married and started our own family which in effect replaced the families of my youth since many had moved a distance away and we didn't stay in close contact. We had what could be considered a mid-sized family for our block had two families living next door to each other that had over twenty kids between them, around the corner was a family with eight or nine and a little down the block one family had nine girls so our family of seven was not considered all that large. The neighborhood was awash with children laughing and playing a little like Corona and The Hill. My children have given me happiness beyond description. When they were growing up I used to like to say we had six animals and one girl to those who would inquire. My girl is always there supporting me now and in the past. She was there when her mother, my love, could no longer take care of herself. We talk almost every day. My sons try not to show emotion which I guess is my fault. They too were there when their mother lost her hold on anything. There was the Respite group which they all financed. My son the lawyer helped me through many hurdles which could have cost a fortune. My first and second son walked me through all the hurdles when my house burned down. Listen, the importance of family can't be stressed and that includes my daughter-in-laws
who always jumped to the forefront when needed. Let me put it this way, when they were young they couldn't have survived without me and their mother, my love. Now in my later years I don't think I could survive without them.
There are so many things I could write about but I started this I wanted to say that my life has been a series of "Happy New Years" even if I didn't think so at the time. But for all that I might have wished for my "Happy New Years", none could beat what I have experienced through being born into such a great family, growing up in neighborhoods which gave a feeling of family, and having a family coming out of a great love between a young girl and her guy. Whatever you may be hoping for this coming year be sure you grab on to what is most important and if you have a family grab it, hug it, love it and never let it go.
Being in a reflexive state I find myself going back to the beginning. By the luck of the draw, or the Grace of God, I was born into a terrific family. Not only was my Mother and Father great people who loved me but I had a ready made extended family. While it was only my brother and me there were great Uncles, Aunts Grandparents and most of all cousins of all ages that were more like brothers and sisters. We all lived within a mile of each other so everyone saw everyone almost each day. They tell me we were poor but I never knew it. There was always plenty to eat, lots of people around making a lot of noise mostly by laughing and of course arguing. The ethnicity was Italian so there was always a lot of hugging, fighting and making up. But most of all a lot of food. The whole situation was like a great cocoon with me the baby safely inside of it protected by the whole neighborhood since most were friends or friends of friends, more like family. What a great feeling, having a family which is there always for each other.
A neighborhood means so much to a kid growing up. My first neighborhood was Corona, providing the cocoon referred to above. We moved from Corona to Queensborough Hill, Flushing when I was about five years old but the Corona I knew never really moved out of me. I suddenly found myself in this new place, The Hill, with no one around that I knew. I rode my tricycle up the block and met a guy whose name was Eugene but everyone called him Babe, maybe after Babe Ruth whom he resembled or because he was the baby in his family, the third son born maybe a decade after his two older brothers. I made a lot of other friends but Babe and I are still friends after some seventy-two years. Quickly The Hill became mine. Ethnically it was different from Corona. I met a lot of Irish and they were quieter than my Italian family but they had a sense of humor that was just as quick and funny. Their food was different but it was good, my introduction to how "others" lived. Babe's mother was a real lady, genteel but his father gave a rough and tumble appearance, like he could handle himself in a brawl. Babe's two older brothers had a reputation that kept Babe safe and sound not that he needed their protection but having two older brothers in reserve just in case wasn't too bad. For WW II, one joined the Army the other the Navy, an original Intrepid gunner. Needless to say they saw plenty of action as did my uncles, and cousins. The Hill was the best place to grow up as it was a melting pot of German, Irish and Italian. We had no Blacks, Negros as they were referred to then, nor did we have more than one or two Jewish families. Our loss but that loss was made up when I went to Flushing High School. Flushing High gave me what could be called the best, although I had other bests, four years of my life. Great teachers, students and a real melting pot where I met people of all persuasions and color and grew to love them all, except of course crazy George and his gang, but I digress.
When I hit my twenties I met a great girl. She was gorgeous, smart, dressed up always and best of all laughed at all my jokes. I ran and ran after her until she finally caught me. She was Puerto Rican which was great because it exposed me to more of what other people were like, besides she had that hot Latin blood, know what I mean(?). We got married and started our own family which in effect replaced the families of my youth since many had moved a distance away and we didn't stay in close contact. We had what could be considered a mid-sized family for our block had two families living next door to each other that had over twenty kids between them, around the corner was a family with eight or nine and a little down the block one family had nine girls so our family of seven was not considered all that large. The neighborhood was awash with children laughing and playing a little like Corona and The Hill. My children have given me happiness beyond description. When they were growing up I used to like to say we had six animals and one girl to those who would inquire. My girl is always there supporting me now and in the past. She was there when her mother, my love, could no longer take care of herself. We talk almost every day. My sons try not to show emotion which I guess is my fault. They too were there when their mother lost her hold on anything. There was the Respite group which they all financed. My son the lawyer helped me through many hurdles which could have cost a fortune. My first and second son walked me through all the hurdles when my house burned down. Listen, the importance of family can't be stressed and that includes my daughter-in-laws
who always jumped to the forefront when needed. Let me put it this way, when they were young they couldn't have survived without me and their mother, my love. Now in my later years I don't think I could survive without them.
There are so many things I could write about but I started this I wanted to say that my life has been a series of "Happy New Years" even if I didn't think so at the time. But for all that I might have wished for my "Happy New Years", none could beat what I have experienced through being born into such a great family, growing up in neighborhoods which gave a feeling of family, and having a family coming out of a great love between a young girl and her guy. Whatever you may be hoping for this coming year be sure you grab on to what is most important and if you have a family grab it, hug it, love it and never let it go.
Friday, December 23, 2011
The Magic of Christmas
Somehow it didn't seem like Christmas to him. The music was all around him playing Christmas songs and carols. The people were out shopping. The stores were crowded and strangely enough most were exhibiting good cheer. There was a nip in the air and just a smell of snow to come. The Christmas lights were shedding all the reds, yellows and icicle lights on each block. He was feeling pretty good physically yet, in his heart, in his soul something was missing. He guessed it was the excitement that was felt about Christmas when he was young. There were different stages of his youth that reflected different feeling of excitement.
Up to eight or nine years of age the feeling of Christmas held the magic of this old bearded guy in a red suit who was going to reward you with a gift mysteriously leaving it under the tree while everyone was asleep. It wasn't so much what you were getting rather it was the game of mystery, of the unknown. You could try to stay awake and surprise him but eventually you fell asleep. Then with a start you'd wake up in the middle of the night and run down a flight to see your present under the tree. What a wonder! What a surprise! What was even better was getting something you never dreamed of but once it was there you knew it was what you wanted all the time but never had the ingenuity to think of it. One Christmas his brother got a Charlie McCarthy and he got a Mortimer Snerd. This drove him to the library to study ventriloquism. Charlie McCarthy and Mortimer Snerd were the dummies, he preferred to think of them as side kicks, to Edgar Bergen, a famous ventriloquist who had a fabulously successful radio show called The Chase and Sanborn hour. He never got the idea of how to throw his voice but it was a year of fun trying. One Christmas he found a sturdy cardboard representation of an Airplane cockpit. He was enthralled with the idea of flying but soon had to give up the notion of becoming a Pilot. He was afraid of heights.
He grew out of the magic of Santa Claus and lost some of the magic and excitement of the season. Soon he was caught up in the family aspect of Christmas and the magic came back to him. Counting his aunts, uncles, cousins, mother father and brother there must of been always forty or fifty people around to celebrate the holidays. There was always plenty of food. On Christmas Eve we Catholics couldn't eat in between meals nor could we eat meat. The Dinner with relatives was full of fish, marinara sauce for the spaghetti and plenty of wine, coffee and soda. Some would go to Midnight Mass which was always jammed packed. The ushers would dress up in their Sunday best as would the faithful, sometimes the ushers dressed in tuxedos. It was a solemn high mass but you could feel the good joy of all present. Almost all were waiting for the mass to be over so they could return to the houses like his which had a feast waiting for them. Everyone ate and drank and laughed until early morning. Getting to bed at three and for those who didn't make midnight mass, going to the 12:15, last Christmas Day mass would be followed by going over a realative's house for more eating, drinking and merry making.
For one reason or another this too faded, he liked to blame the automobile claiming it separated families, nobody was in walking distance of anybody anymore. Besides many of the relatives aged, became infirm and passed on. He then found the magic of Christmas in what he called the true meaning of Christmas, the birth of Christ and the saving of the world through the incarnation. His Church wanted this true meaning emphasized, but their emphasis was too solemn. This magic brought too many tears if followed so he concentrated on the person of Jesus, His mother and Father here on earth. He found magic in their love and good nature. Mary, just a kid, a teenager, accepting this Angel's word that God somehow was going to work miracles through her. Joseph, not rejecting or stoning Mary for being pregnant outside of marriage, rather taking her into his home and raising her kid as his own. Much of what he did followed dreams in which he was instructed to do these things. What a guy! Imagine if you had a dream that instructed you to do something quite extraordinary, you'd pass it off as some hallucination. Joseph rather helped changed the whole world by accepting the challenges set before him with faith and hope. Then of course was the magic of Christmas, Jesus Himself. This little defenseless babe who would grow up to challenge the authorities of his time and the time to come. Jesus, who loved a party; loved the downtrodden; didn't mind associating with thieves, prostitutes and tax collectors because he apparently found them more exciting than the hypocrites who were heading the Jewish faith and Government. Jesus who was always full of love. This was magic. But as this magic of Christmas wore on it became more of everyday life for him and the specialness of Christmas faded.
When he married and had children the magic of Christmas returned through their eyes. But too soon they grew and spread their wings as all must do and the togetherness of Christmas became fragmented. He always wanted to have a special Christmas with just his wife and him but time didn't allow it as he thought it could be. She fell ill and their last years together did allow them to have special Christmases, not like they show in the movies but only as can be experienced in real life for those who love. She passed and although his holidays are filled with children, grandchildren and friends there is an emptiness to the season. Gone is his youth when he believed in the fat old elf who knew just the right things to bring him. Gone is his family who once lived within walking distance and bring their cheer and love that can only be shared by a united family.
The religious feeling has slipped as midnight mass no longer holds the specialness it once did. It has become apparent that if there is a magic to Christmas that is holy this magic can not be held only to one season as it was meant for all seasons which in itself makes the other seasons more magic while it lessens the magic for Christmas. And most of all she is gone. Unfortunately one never knows the treasure one has until it is taken away from him. What he does have is his memories and, God willing, no one will be able to take them away from him.
Up to eight or nine years of age the feeling of Christmas held the magic of this old bearded guy in a red suit who was going to reward you with a gift mysteriously leaving it under the tree while everyone was asleep. It wasn't so much what you were getting rather it was the game of mystery, of the unknown. You could try to stay awake and surprise him but eventually you fell asleep. Then with a start you'd wake up in the middle of the night and run down a flight to see your present under the tree. What a wonder! What a surprise! What was even better was getting something you never dreamed of but once it was there you knew it was what you wanted all the time but never had the ingenuity to think of it. One Christmas his brother got a Charlie McCarthy and he got a Mortimer Snerd. This drove him to the library to study ventriloquism. Charlie McCarthy and Mortimer Snerd were the dummies, he preferred to think of them as side kicks, to Edgar Bergen, a famous ventriloquist who had a fabulously successful radio show called The Chase and Sanborn hour. He never got the idea of how to throw his voice but it was a year of fun trying. One Christmas he found a sturdy cardboard representation of an Airplane cockpit. He was enthralled with the idea of flying but soon had to give up the notion of becoming a Pilot. He was afraid of heights.
He grew out of the magic of Santa Claus and lost some of the magic and excitement of the season. Soon he was caught up in the family aspect of Christmas and the magic came back to him. Counting his aunts, uncles, cousins, mother father and brother there must of been always forty or fifty people around to celebrate the holidays. There was always plenty of food. On Christmas Eve we Catholics couldn't eat in between meals nor could we eat meat. The Dinner with relatives was full of fish, marinara sauce for the spaghetti and plenty of wine, coffee and soda. Some would go to Midnight Mass which was always jammed packed. The ushers would dress up in their Sunday best as would the faithful, sometimes the ushers dressed in tuxedos. It was a solemn high mass but you could feel the good joy of all present. Almost all were waiting for the mass to be over so they could return to the houses like his which had a feast waiting for them. Everyone ate and drank and laughed until early morning. Getting to bed at three and for those who didn't make midnight mass, going to the 12:15, last Christmas Day mass would be followed by going over a realative's house for more eating, drinking and merry making.
For one reason or another this too faded, he liked to blame the automobile claiming it separated families, nobody was in walking distance of anybody anymore. Besides many of the relatives aged, became infirm and passed on. He then found the magic of Christmas in what he called the true meaning of Christmas, the birth of Christ and the saving of the world through the incarnation. His Church wanted this true meaning emphasized, but their emphasis was too solemn. This magic brought too many tears if followed so he concentrated on the person of Jesus, His mother and Father here on earth. He found magic in their love and good nature. Mary, just a kid, a teenager, accepting this Angel's word that God somehow was going to work miracles through her. Joseph, not rejecting or stoning Mary for being pregnant outside of marriage, rather taking her into his home and raising her kid as his own. Much of what he did followed dreams in which he was instructed to do these things. What a guy! Imagine if you had a dream that instructed you to do something quite extraordinary, you'd pass it off as some hallucination. Joseph rather helped changed the whole world by accepting the challenges set before him with faith and hope. Then of course was the magic of Christmas, Jesus Himself. This little defenseless babe who would grow up to challenge the authorities of his time and the time to come. Jesus, who loved a party; loved the downtrodden; didn't mind associating with thieves, prostitutes and tax collectors because he apparently found them more exciting than the hypocrites who were heading the Jewish faith and Government. Jesus who was always full of love. This was magic. But as this magic of Christmas wore on it became more of everyday life for him and the specialness of Christmas faded.
When he married and had children the magic of Christmas returned through their eyes. But too soon they grew and spread their wings as all must do and the togetherness of Christmas became fragmented. He always wanted to have a special Christmas with just his wife and him but time didn't allow it as he thought it could be. She fell ill and their last years together did allow them to have special Christmases, not like they show in the movies but only as can be experienced in real life for those who love. She passed and although his holidays are filled with children, grandchildren and friends there is an emptiness to the season. Gone is his youth when he believed in the fat old elf who knew just the right things to bring him. Gone is his family who once lived within walking distance and bring their cheer and love that can only be shared by a united family.
The religious feeling has slipped as midnight mass no longer holds the specialness it once did. It has become apparent that if there is a magic to Christmas that is holy this magic can not be held only to one season as it was meant for all seasons which in itself makes the other seasons more magic while it lessens the magic for Christmas. And most of all she is gone. Unfortunately one never knows the treasure one has until it is taken away from him. What he does have is his memories and, God willing, no one will be able to take them away from him.
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