Thursday, March 30, 2017
I thought I'd Miss You Less
The best thing that ever happened to me was you. I did tell you that many times but many times I acted as if that wasn't true. I am sorry for that because you always were much better than me but you never knew that.
You are one of the most beautiful woman I ever laid my eyes on and that includes super models and movie stars. Like Sophia Loren you never lost your beauty, but like wine you got better as you aged.
You have it all. You are intelligent with a flair for languages, four in which you are fluent. You were able to run a very dysfunctional household very well. You worked in the school system very effectively. But more important than all of that was the purity of your soul. Your kindness of heart and your empathy for those who were downtrodden.
Through no fault of your own you started to leave me bit by bit after we were together 35 years due to the horrors of Alzheimer's Disease and then shortly after we were together 50 years you were called home and we were separated physically until the call comes for me.
The funny thing is even though we are separated physically I feel your presence whenever my thoughts turn to you or any other things of love. The other peculiar thing is I miss you more now than when you first left. I had thought that time would lessen the feeling of loss but it doesn't as living without you makes me miss you even more than when you first left. The wound has healed so I am not bleeding as I once was but the scar reminds me of what I have lost, your soft skin, your yielding lips, hands ready to soothe, always ready to accept me and lift me up, never to throw me down.
There's no way we can correct this situation and so I shall wait until we meet again and we shall, of this I am sure.
Until then stay with me, help me through the way of life as I live my destiny. Help me find solace and joy maybe even with some other person. But know this, you are my love first, last and always. I am so blest to have had the privilege of sharing our lives together. I love you!!!